- Using general words, like "good." Be specific about what your child has done well so she knows how to repeat it.
- Taking responsibility for your child's success. "If I hadn't made you study every night the week before, you might have failed again." "I told you you'd be a natural; that's why I signed you up."
- Punishing a child for his mistakes. Mistakes are a necessary part of learning and show what still needs to be understood or addressed.
- Offering money or presents. This can backfire as children demand more, view learning as a means to an end, or feel they lack your trust to achieve without it.
- Using sarcasm. "This report card is great, but it took you long enough to get there!" "That model's perfect! Who'd know you used to be all thumbs?"