Quick Click: 9 Parent-Tested Ways to Ease Separation Anxiety
Ease preschool drop-offs with these simple suggestions.
Books like Audrey Penn's The Kissing Hand can help preschoolers overcome separation anxiety.
No mom or dad likes to hear that piteous cry: "Don't leave me!" So we polled parents for advice on how to handle tough morning transitions. Here are some of their great ideas:
A Kiss to Keep: I use the cute technique found in the book The Kissing Hand. I plant a kiss on my daughter's palm and it comforts her to know a part of mom is with her during the day. Lori P., Carlisle, PA
Secret Picture: Both of my children had to bring in a plastic box to put their crayons in, so I taped a laminated picture of our family signing "I Love You" into the bottom of it. Now they always have us with them, and can discreetly look at us for support whenever they need it. Crystal S., Duncan, SC
Goodbye Game: Every morning before school, I pull out 10 cards showing a picture of lips (indicating a kiss) and a mom hugging a child. Next to each picture there is a number, which tells my daughter how many kisses and hugs she will get from mommy. Every morning I shuffle the cards and have her choose one. We exchange kisses and hugs and she goes to school much happier. Wanda S., Brooklyn, NY
A Rewarding Day: Sometimes if my children are super clingy, I promise them a reward if they make it through the day. That definitely works! Lori P., Carlisle, PA
Brag Book: We bought a small plastic photo album and filled it with pictures of our family. When we drop off our son at school, if he starts to cry, his teacher says, "Come show me your pictures." He says goodbye to us and brings his album to his teacher. He loves naming everyone in the album for his teachers and friends. Randi O., Highland Park, NJ
Summer School: I took my children to the school to play on the playground several times a week all summer. We also peeked in all the windows, and talked about what we thought happened in there. You need to check and see if it is okay with your school, but ours was perfectly fine with people being on the grounds. Crystal S., Duncan, SC
Change the Subject: What works best with my kids is to distract them. On the way to school, my son used to get upset and talk about how he didn't want to go to school. To distract him, we started to look for school buses and count how many we saw. He loved it and would talk about riding one when he got older. Tina C., Ocean Springs, MS
Especially for You: With my daughter, the key was to find a toy that I knew she would like as soon as we arrived in the classroom. It distracted her, but also was special because Mom picked it out. Tina C., Ocean Springs, MS
The Simple Truth: Sometimes, a simple reassurance works wonders. One day we told our son, "You don't have to cry. Mommy and Daddy always come back." For some reason, this struck a chord with him. He stopped crying and ever since, when we say goodbye, he says, "Mommy and daddy always come back," and waves as we leave. Randi O., Highland Park, NJ
